Monday, October 19, 2009

Take a Leap of Faith..!

We recently took a BIG Leap of Faith!

We made the decision to attend church
for the first time in a very long time.

Our child, Matthew, who has complete Agenesis
of the Corpus Callosum is developmentally
delayed in all areas. He is 16 years old.
However, he functions on a very young level.

We cannot leave Matthew in the nursery or
in children's church alone because he requires
someone to stay with him due to his delays and
his special needs.

When you have a child who has special needs
there may be times when you find yourself
becoming isolated from some activities for
various reasons that will depend upon your
own particular circumstances.

The isolation may be partly a result of your
own fears and concerns that you wrestle with
in your mind. Those fears and concerns then
further prevent you from seeing anything but
additional distance from the place you want
to be.

In our case, Matthew does not have behavior
issues. Quite the contrary. He is very sweet
and full of love and kisses, lots of smiles and
is a genuinely happy boy from the time he wakes
up until he goes to bed.

We were concerned if he would make noise
and babble sounds outloud during a quiet
time or during the sermon. Also, he
struggles with problems like having a lot
of gas and burping.

We were unsure if a gigantic, loud burp
would burst forth from his mouth during
church service or (God forbid) from the
other end.

But the reality is he doesn't do those things
on purpose or to be disruptive and yes those
things may happen (even while sitting in church)
but we put one foot in front of the other
(and determined to try it)...we went to church
despite our fears and concerns.

Our first Sunday went beautifully during church.
Matthew did great! We sat at the back of the
church in the last row on the aisle (so we could
easily get up and step out if need be) and sat
Matthew in between myself and my husband during
the church service. During the service Matthew
would lean to kiss me and get a kiss, then lean
toward his dad for a kiss and this became a
sweet ritual throughout the entire service.

We also brought something he likes to do to keep
his hands busy. It was such a blessing to step
out of our isolation, join the community and
have fellowship.

Last Sunday also went very well. Matthew loves
music! We stand up often during the service
to sing songs and Matthew's head moves from
side-to-side while the sounds of singing
voices and melodious music fill the room.
Again, the sweet kissing ritual took place.
He is happy! We are happy!

Did he make some noise? Yes, this time he

Did he burp out loud? Yes. He didn't do
it on purpose and I have come to terms
with the fact that he will probably do it
again. But, as much as we are both a bit
concerned and embarassed, we won't let it
stop us from going to church.

Last night my husband said to me that he
was worried while sitting in church last
Sunday that Matthew was going to let out a
huge, loud burp and it surprised me that he
had those feelings. I didn't really think
that my husband felt awkward like I do about
those kinds of things.

Is there something that you have stopped
doing; something that you want to do as a
family but aren't sure how or if it will
work due to your own situation..?

I encourage you to make a decision to try
whatever that something is that you have
become isolated from doing and to take
your own Leap of Faith..!


  1. Oh yes, we have had the same concerns and trying to make it work. Starting from an early age and hoping to make it work as time goes on.

    A few weeks ago, our little guy went in to a terrible seizure at church and we had to call for an ambulance...not a great way to make people feel comfortable with him!

  2. OH Sandie! I am so proud of you, your husband, and Matthew for taking this huge step! I read the whole thing with a huge smile on my face and pictured Matthew doing his kiss thing. Funny enough church is one of the things we as a family have stopped doing afraid of Brianna not being able to handle sitting through the entire service or God forbid an apnic episode! Thanks for sharing HUGS

  3. Hi Sandie,
    I just happened to browse your blog while I was searching for an image to depict big leap.
    I just did not get the image but also an insight into your and Matthew's world.

    All I can say is that when you take Matthew out in any public place, remember that most of the times people are praying for his health. They are amazed at the way you and your husband live you your life and are proud of your parenting. The Church community or for that matter any support community will always be happy to see Matthew share his love and special moments with you. Those who are bothered by his mannerisms miss the innocence of Matthew.

    He is god's special child. And you are his privileged care takers.



  4. Hi Mandar Karnik, (cleanslate)

    This morning I was reading my e-mail and saw your warm and touching comment and it made me smile.

    Thank you very much for your kind words and for taking time to express your thoughts in such a meaningful way to another person. The idea that you were searching for a "big leap" image and slowed down to take a
    detour browse of the blog--and then wrote an expression from your heart is very special...and so you are, Mandar.

    May God richly pour out His blessings on you.


    Sandie (Matthew's Mom)


I am very interested in reading your comments and
look forward to hearing from you. Thank you.